英語笑話帶翻譯三則

　　1、Three turtles decided to have a cup of coffee. Just as they got into the cafe, it started to rain.The biggest turtle said to the smallest one, " Go home and get the umbrella."The little turtle replied, "I will, if you don't drink my offee.""We won't," the other two promised.Two years later the big turtle said to the middle turtle, "Well, I guess he isn't coming back, so we might as well drink his coffee."Just then a voice called from outside the door, "If you do, I won't go."

　　三只烏龜決定去喝咖啡。它們剛到咖啡店的門口，就下起雨來。于是最大的那只烏龜對(duì)最小的烏龜說，“回家去取傘吧。”最小的烏龜說，“如果你們不把我的咖啡喝了，我就去。”“我們不喝，”另外兩只烏龜答應(yīng)說。兩年后，大烏龜對(duì)中烏龜說，“好吧，我猜他肯定不回來了，我們可以把它的咖啡喝掉了。”正在這時(shí)，一個(gè)聲音從門外傳來，“你們要是喝了，我就不去。”

　　2、A pig and a chicken were walking by a church where a gala charity event was taking place.Getting caught up in the spirit, the pig suggested to the chicken that they each make a contribution."Great idea!" the chicken cried."Let's offer hem ham and eggs?""Not so fast," said the pig testily. "For you, that's a contribution. For me, it's a total commitment."

　　一只豬和一只雞路過一所教堂，那里有一場(chǎng)盛大慈善活動(dòng)正在進(jìn)行著。在精神上收到觸動(dòng)的豬向小雞提出建議：他們每個(gè)人作出點(diǎn)自己的貢獻(xiàn)。“好主意!”雞尖叫道，“讓我們給腿和雞蛋吧?”“著什么急”豬不耐煩地說，“對(duì)你來說，是一個(gè)貢獻(xiàn)，對(duì)我來說，這是一個(gè)完全的獻(xiàn)身。”

　　3、A jackal who was going to be eaten by a lion. The jackal said to the lion: "No, please, you can't eat me! You can't eat me! This will be a great mistake. If you eat me, that'll be terrible, that will be a disaster, that will be the end of the world!"The lion was very puzzled and said: "How come? How come if I eat you, the world will end?"The jackal said:"Because if you eat me, that will be the end of the world for me!"

　　有只狼快被獅子吃掉了。狼對(duì)獅子說：“求求你不要吃我!你不能吃我，這是一個(gè)天大的錯(cuò)誤!如果你吃了我，那就慘了，會(huì)有災(zāi)難、會(huì)世界末日!”獅子滿臉疑惑地問：“為什么把你吃掉就會(huì)世界末日?”狼回答：“如果你吃了我，就是我的世界末日啊!”

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