英語(yǔ)笑話搞笑爆笑

時(shí)間：2020-11-19 09:32:57 英語(yǔ)笑話我要投稿

英語(yǔ)笑話搞笑集錦爆笑

　　笑話能與愉悅我們的心情，今天我們就一起來(lái)欣賞英語(yǔ)笑話搞笑集錦爆笑吧!

英語(yǔ)笑話搞笑集錦爆笑

　　英語(yǔ)笑話搞笑集錦爆笑(一)

　　What a big deal A young businessman had just started his business, and rented a beautiful office. Sitting there, he saw a man come into the outer office. Wishing to appear busy, the businessman picked up the phone and pretended that he had a big deal working. He threw huge figures around and made giant commitments. Finally, he hung up and asked the visitor. “Can I help you?” The man said, “Sure. I’ve come to install the phone.”

　　我是來(lái)裝電話的一個(gè)年輕人剛剛開始做生意，就租了一個(gè)漂亮的辦公室。一天，他坐在辦公室里，看到有一個(gè)人在外面，于是他就裝作生意很忙的樣子，拿起電話胡吹亂侃，還不停的甩出幾個(gè)大數(shù)字，好像在談一筆大買賣。到了最后，他終于掛了電話，問(wèn)來(lái)訪的人，“有事兒嘛?”那個(gè)人回答，“我是來(lái)給你安裝電話的。”

　　英語(yǔ)笑話搞笑集錦爆笑(二)

　　Two soldiers were in camp. The first one‘s name was George, and the second one‘s name was Bill. George said, "have you got a piece of paper and an envelope, Bill?"

　　Bill said, "Yes, I have," and he gave them to him.

　　Then George said, "Now I haven‘t got a pen." Bill gave him his, and George wrote his letter. Then he put it in the envelope and said, "have you got a stamp, Bill?" Bill gave him one.

　　Then Bill got up and went to the door, so George said to him, "Are you going out?"

　　Bill Said, "Yes, I am," and he opened the door.

　　George said, "Please put my letter in the box in the office, and..." He stopped.

　　"What do you want now?" Bill said to him.

　　George looked at the envelope of his letter and answered, "What‘s your girl-friend‘s address?"

　　軍營(yíng)里有二名士兵，一個(gè)叫喬治，一個(gè)叫比爾。喬治問(wèn)：“比爾，你有信紙、信封嗎?”

　　比爾說(shuō)：“有。”然后把信紙和信封給了喬治。

　　喬治又說(shuō)：“我還沒(méi)有筆呢。”比爾又把自己的筆給了他。喬治開始寫信。寫完后把信放進(jìn)信封里，又問(wèn)：“比爾，你有郵票嗎?”比爾給了他一張。

　　這時(shí)比爾站起來(lái)，向門口走去。喬治問(wèn)：“你要出去嗎?”

　　比爾說(shuō)：“是的。”隨即打開了門。

　　喬治說(shuō)：“請(qǐng)幫我把這封信投進(jìn)辦公室的信箱里，還有...”他停住了。

　　“你還要什么?”比爾問(wèn)。

　　喬治看著信封說(shuō)：“你女朋友的地址是-?”

　　英語(yǔ)笑話搞笑集錦爆笑(三)

　　During World War II, a lot of young women in Britain were in the army. Joan Phillips was one of them. She worked in a big camp, and of course met a lot of men, officers and soldiers.

　　One evening she met Captain Humphreys at a dance. He said to her, "I‘m going abroad tomorrow, but I‘d be very happy if we could write to each other." Joan agreed, and they wrote for several months.

　　Then his letters stopped, but she received one from another officer, telling her that he had been wounded and was in a certain army hospital in England.

　　Joan went there and said to the matron, "I‘ve come to visit Captain Humphreys."

　　"Only relatives are allowed to visit patients here," the matron said.

　　"Oh, that‘s all right," answered Joan. "I‘m his sister."

　　"I‘m very pleased to meet you," the matron said, "I‘m his mother!"

　　在第二次世界大戰(zhàn)中，有許多年輕的'婦女在軍營(yíng)中服役。瓊.飛利浦斯是其中之一。她在一個(gè)大軍營(yíng)中工作，當(dāng)然遇到了許多男士，包括軍官和士兵。

　　一天晚上她在舞會(huì)上遇到了軍官漢弗雷斯。他對(duì)她說(shuō)，“我明天就要出國(guó)，但如果我們能夠相互寫信，我會(huì)很高興。”瓊同意了，于是他們幾個(gè)月里一直通著信。

　　后來(lái)，他再?zèng)]有來(lái)信。她收到了另一個(gè)軍官的信，告訴她，他受傷了，住在英格蘭的某個(gè)部隊(duì)醫(yī)院里。

　　瓊到了醫(yī)院，她對(duì)護(hù)士長(zhǎng)說(shuō)，“我來(lái)看望軍官漢弗雷斯。”

　　“這里只有親屬可以探望病人。”護(hù)士長(zhǎng)說(shuō)。

　　“噢，是的，”瓊說(shuō)，“我是他的妹妹。”

　　“很高興認(rèn)識(shí)你，”護(hù)士長(zhǎng)說(shuō)，“我是他的母親。”

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